I also miss his encouraging words on parenting & for his help with Logan. It's hard doing this parent thing alone & in just 4 short weeks I won't have to anymore! Being home is great, but also a challenge.
In the meantime I have learned & re-vamped a little parenting around here. I wanted to share with you all a few things that I am doing & trying with Logan these days.
Our little boy is...determined. You can spin it to say strong-willed, stubborn, aggressive, rough, crazy! He's very active, he desires dominance, & he really likes things in order & done his way. This makes our daily life a little tough! But, after trying a few things there are some things I KNOW my Logan needs.
1. Words: words are so important. I realize that sometimes I get upset or frustrated with Logan & instead of saying kinder words, I end up telling him he's not nice or stop! Stop! Stop! While it's ok for me to sit him down & tell him "No, you cannot behave/do that", I CAN also tell him "I understand you're sad & frustrated, but let's not do those things."
Words can crush our babies, speak them lightly. For it is easier to fix a child's behavior than to fix an adults broken spirit.
2. RELIEF: Since being alone with Logan 24/7 sometimes I need some relief. I learned to be okay with sending Logan for some "time" for himself. We have a play room---that's what it's for! Play time. He has tons of games, puzzles, toys, & books he can enjoy. If I need the time, I take it, Logan will be fine!
Moms, take a break!!! Even if it means buying $1 coffee from McDonalds & reading a book in the booth while your little one plays!
3. Be firm in your boundaries: This one is hard & has caused lots of tantrums in our house! I am making sure that my strong willed child doesn't turn into the kid that thinks the streets are playgrounds. Logan is one to test the boundaries, but he also KNOWS for sure when he is doing something wrong. Even if he falls out into a tantrum on the floor, I've still got to show him boundaries for respect & safety.
Don't back down, you are the parent. Stand firm in the boundaries even when they are frustrating.
4. Realistic expectations: We have GOT to stop expecting so much from our little humans. This is tuff when we want convenience & personal time, but it's not right for us to head to a 5 star restaurant right before naptime & forget to bring the toys or iPad to keep them busy! Since being home, this has been a hard one because I want to go & say yes to everything...but I can't. I know Logans schedule, his limits, his wants. I cannot say yes to a lunch with a friend when I know Logan will want to nap at that time. I cannot say yes to a play date at the theater when I know Logan cannot behave or sit still at a movie.
Learn your kids routine & cater to it...yes I said it, cater to your kid!! Not because they are spoiled, but because they are toddlers & they don't get it!
5. Be patient & appreciative: This has been the BIGGEST learning experience for me. Since being home I have really worked on these because if I am telling the truth here...I was awful before. I lost my patience fairly quickly & I would correct without telling him the positives as much as I should have. I now try very hard to be patient when Logan makes a mistake, spills something, or intentionally acts up. I also have learned to be more appreciative & to praise Logan when he does something good. Give him lots of hugs & tell him I'm proud of him, I love him, & he's such a good little guy.
Give your child patience & words of affirmation & appreciation.
So cheers to being a better mom, learning from my mistakes, and appreciating not only my sweet boy, but my partner & helpmate Zo more. Single parenting is tuff!!! Shout out to all you beautiful mom & dads that do it alone!
Have a fabulous week friends!
-Morgan
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